It's All My Fault But Then Again Maybe Not
by kira66
Summary: Shawn and Gus did good saving those kids. But doing good doesn't always get you a reward.


Shawn was so focused on the two headstones in front of him that he failed to notice the other mourners had all hugged, cried, and left; and why shouldn't they since the funeral was over? "It's all my fault." He whispered brokenly, guiltily.

"No it wasn't." Burton 'Gus' Guster told his friend as he stepped up beside him. He followed his friends eyes and inspected the headstones for himself. "Beloved son." He read aloud. "Simple yet….heartfelt." It was surprising that out of the two he was the one taking all of this in stride. "Who knew two little words could betray so much?"

"How can you be so calm?" Shawn asked as he tore his guilt filled eyes away from the almost identical headstones to look at his best friend. "Why aren't you freaking out?"

Gus shrugged and looked out across the quiet cemetery. "I guess I feel at peace because I know it was _neither_ of our faults. You gotta accept that move on, Shawn."

Shawn crossed his arms over his chest. "Maybe I don't wanna move on. Ever think of that?" He swallowed thickly. "Maybe it's too painful." He whispered.

Gus had nothing to say to that so he just stood with his friend as he tried to wrap his head around what had happened. The sun had almost completely set when he noticed a man moving through the darkened cemetery towards them. He elbowed his quiet friend and motioned with his head.

"What's he doing here?" Shawn asked darkly. Why was he here now when he couldn't even be bothered to attend the funeral? "Can you give us a minute?" He asked of his friend.

Something akin to amusement danced through Gus' eyes but it was gone quickly and he nodded. "I'll be over there." He motioned towards a nearby bench that was positioned under a tall tree.

Shawn shoved his hands into his pockets as the man, his father, reached his side. "Dad." He greeted.

"Shawn." Henry Spencer pulled his jacket a little tighter to ward off the sudden chill that enveloped him. "I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner. I was on the boat….didn't get the messages until I got home." He said gruffly. "This shouldn't have happened." Emotionless eyes focused on the headstones.

"No, it shouldn't have." Shawn agreed. "It was my fault, I should have listened to you and let the police handle it." He admitted.

Henry cleared his throat. "It wasn't your fault, kid. Karen said you and Gus saved those kids and that a lot more people would have gotten hurt had it not been for you two." He paused. "And no one could have known that the guy had rigged the building to blow."

Shawn snorted. "Maybe but they were paying me to know so I should have." Silence fell between the two men. "How are Jules and Lassie?" He asked finally unable to stand the silence any longer.

"Lassiter and O'Hara are in pretty bad shape. Detective Lassiter caught the blast in the back and was thrown into a police car. He has yet to regain consciousness. And Detective O'Hara….they aren't very hopeful that she'll make it through the night. She was much closer to the blast. If you hadn't tried to push her out of the way….she'd be dead right now. At least you gave _her_ family the chance to say goodbye." He crouched down and laid his hand on the cool marble of the headstone. "No parent should outlive their kid." He whispered.

"Doesn't always work that way, Dad." Shawn said with a shrug and for the first time since the bomb went off he was beginning to feel at peace.

Henry swallowed hard and stood. "I love you Shawn and I'm proud of you. I'm just sorry I didn't say it when I had the chance." His eyes moved to the other headstone. "Take care of him Gus and keep him out of trouble for me." He said thickly as he turned on his heel and walked away.

Shawn watched his father walk away. "I love you too dad." He took a deep breath and let it out. "It was too soon Gus." He knew his friend was at his side once again. "There was so much I wanted to do like eat a pineapple popsicle and try pineapple crusted salmon. Well maybe not the last one but I _definitely_ wanted to eat a pineapple popsicle."

Gus snorted. "I'm sure Heaven has all the pineapple you can eat." He started through the darkness.

"Really?" Shawn's eyes lit up at the prospect. "That'd be so cool!" He started after his friend. "Where are we going? Isn't Heaven that way?" He pointed up.

"We're going to the hospital." Gus told him.

Shawn blinked and furrowed his brow. "Isn't it a little late for that with us being dead and all? Or did you forget a building blew up and fell on us?"

Gus rolled his eyes. "We were actually killed in the initial blast. By the time the building collapsed we were already gone. And thank God for that cause I'm guessing it would have been very painful otherwise."

"True." Shawn fell into step beside his best friend. "So we're going to visit Lassie and Jules? Isn't that gonna be kinda odd with them not being able to see us and all?"

"Your dad said they were in bad shape and I thought maybe they'd want to see a familiar face if they do…..you know." Gus explained.

Shawn nodded. "I'm glad we're together Gus cause otherwise the afterlife would be just a total drag."

It wasn't really the end for Shawn and Gus because they were together and it wouldn't be long before their friends and family joined them; some sooner than others.

Oh and Shawn got all the pineapple he could ever want!

_**FINIS**_


End file.
